Thursday, October 29, 2009

H1N1

I have decided that the H1N1 media scare was propagated by the government... the entire population is now very suddenly familiar with an acronym that has killed as many people in the last year as leprosy.
Oh, and the much needed vaccination is merely a means of delivering a mind control serum.

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Outside

I wanted to get out of the house for a bit, and went for a walk over to the beer store. Half way there I decided to keep on walking down the road to the gov liquor store, the booze was cheaper and I needed the exercise.
Along the way I noticed a handful of police on the corner across the street, they were standing close together and partially hidden from view by a large bush. A traffic stop. I wondered how many speeders they could get from a busy 50kph stretch of road with lots of red lights.
A man sits in front of the liquor store, an empty cup held out before him. He's placed himself just outside of the invisible aura that radiates from the large "No Loitering" sign.
Inside the store I found what I was looking for and lined up for the cash register. There were about four people in front of me, and only one cashier on duty. She looked tired. I settled in for the wait and let my eyes drift around. A man wearing a grey hoodie over a slight build was walking toward the doors, not too quickly but with purpose. He glanced over his shoulder at the lineup, the slight turn of his body revealing a bulge where his left hand rested in the front pocket of the hoodie. Then he was out the door and turning down the sidewalk, another glance in through the windows and gone.
A shrill voice erupts from behind my elbow and a short arm points past me and over the counter.
"Excuse me." The voice is for the cashier but the stubby appendage is directed to the front window. "That man just walked out of here with a forty-pounder of vodka."
The cashier sighs and the arm retracts. The woman paying for her purchases says something to the cashier and she explains that "...unfortunately we can't chase after them. In case they have a weapon. It's been happening more often since the recession." And I place my forty-pounder of vodka on the counter.
Two more employees appear to announce that they can help the next people in line, and the two people behind me split up to either side.
I approach the till and make small talk. "I was thinking that guy seemed a little nervous."
The tired cashier looks out the window. "Yeah, but it's not like I could have seen him when I've got a huge lineup to deal with."
The two temporary helpers have already seen to their customers and disappeared.
Outside the store again, a middle-aged man is loading groceries into the trunk of his European two-seater. A too-skinny woman approaches him and begins explaining that she's not a drug addict. He closes the trunk and listens patiently to her rehearsed diatribe.
Barely half a block away I encounter the police traffic stop again, I'm on the same side of the street this time and about to pass directly through their midst. I notice the way the four young officers are smiling and chatting amongst themselves, without a single eye directed at traffic. Any thoughts I had of mentioning the liquor store are washed away in a stream of indifference.

Monday, August 04, 2008

I kissed a spider today

In a manner of speaking.
Moving some old boxes on the porch revealed a couple of large spiders. There was a trim-end-sized chunk of 1x4 lumber nearby, so I recruited it as my handy arachnid two-dimensionalizer. The first, and smaller of the intruders was dispatched with relative ease. The second had a surprise in store for me. Bringing the lumber swiftly down upon its abdomen, I was rewarded with a "pop" noise that would have been better suited to the kinetic action of the worlds largest pimple. The resulting innards spay, while nearly escaping my direct observation, assaulted another of my senses as one of its globules impacted my lower lip.
It was wonderful.

Monday, January 30, 2006

Holy crap... I have a blog?!?

I forgot all about this damn thing, as I'm sure everyone else has by now too.

I was at Jinx.com for the first time since I bought some of their shirts a couple years back, and since then they've got alot of new Warcraft-inspired T's. They're funny, to me and other Online gamers, but I couldn't wear one in public. I'm a geek, I'm not an uber geek. :)

I especially like the reversed writing for the bathroom mirror on the blue one here. Also, the "Jesus Saves..." isn't actually from WoW, but a reference to oldschool D&D. I included it cuz it's awesome.





Saturday, November 12, 2005

Bling Bling

This guy cracks me up.
Who wants to bet that there's a '74 Caddy Eldorado taking up two spaces in the beach parking lot?

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Meat

The other day it occurred to me that something was missing from my typical food purchasing experiences here in victoria, and it was the butcher shop. In Vernon there was a German butcher that I would stop at on my way home form work. I'd usually get sausages and something weird to gross out Christine, like cow's tongue pate'.... the shit that just isn't the same when it's pulled from a cooler bin at Safeway. So yesterday I checked the yellow pages for butcher shops, and found one that was 10 minutes from my school. Went there today at lunchtime and discovered that it was a Scottish butcher shop. It was frickin sweet. There were pictures of highland cattle on the wall, the condiments on the shelves all had some form of plaid on their labels, and the whole store just smelled awesome... like fresh haggis. I bought bratwurst and smoked pork hocks from a cheery little woman with a thick Scotch accent. I'm cooking up the brats tonight, with beer and potatoes. Tomorrow I'll boil the smoked pork hock in a soup with lots of big veggies.
*drool*

My baby..

...won an "anti-Nike" contest from Adbusters Magazine.

Check it out: Blackspot Shoes

Friday, November 04, 2005

Meh.... Friday

Went all week without drinking.. even though there was beer in the fridge. Yeah, well I'm proud of myself.
Shutup.

I trick-or-treated an innkeeper, he decided to trick me.... turned me into a mini Diablo. I'd probably be scarier if I was more than 3 feet tall.
It's a small world in the Blizzard universe.


Even when your busy killing swarms of giant lizards, it's important to stop and enjoy the occasional sunset.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

I don't update this shit nearly enough anymore

A few weeks back my mom called and told me that she was worried, concerning my recent posts. If you scroll down a few posts, you'll notice that there were 2 or 3 in a row that were the result of drunken ramblings... and they gave credit where credit was due.
Tonight I'm not gonna say anything about alcohol or controlled substances... instead, let's roll the cartoon.

Happy Hallow's End!


The seasonal burning of the Wickerman, every night at 20:00, outside Undercity. Ever seen that movie? No? Go rent it, it's frickin trippy.


Ran a raid with some of the guildies... Here's the UD side of Strathholme. Everything's in a perpetual state of crap.


Takin on a boss in Strath.... here's the view from the *almost* front lines. Hey, I'm a mage, I need to stay at the back and deal out the dps...

Saturday, October 08, 2005

I'm cheap

Most post-secondary institutions are surrounded by pay parking lots, and mine's no exception. It just really chaps my ass that after the school takes their big tuition cheque, we're still expected to fork out two bucks a day to have our cars there. When I was attending this school a few years ago for upgrading and miscellaneous classes, those lots were patrolled by someone on the local payroll. I quickly discovered that simply parking in a lower area, with the nose of the truck up against the bushes, let me get away with not buying one of the little tickets that sit on the dashboard to be viewed from the front of the vehicle. From time to time I did get caught, but a $10 fine every couple weeks was far cheaper than daily handfuls of quarters.
I tried the same routine this year, but the parking management has since been turned over to the same company that takes care of all the really expensive lots downtown. There's a dude in a uniform with a marked pickup that comes through and scours the place at least 3 times a week. There have been three times in the last month that I skipped the ticket, and wound up with a fine on two of those occasions. Bastards.
I considered taking the bus to and from school... but not only do I hate the frickin peasant wagon, but I'm not on a direct route and would have to transfer and crap in both directions.
My prayers were answered just a few days ago. I was on a lunchtime walk along one of the biking trails outside of the school property, when I happened upon a public park. It had baseball diamonds and dog walking paths and... a parking lot. A free parking lot. Following the road out took me through a small subdivision and onto the main route that I normally drive to get to school.
I've been parking there for a week now, and the added bonus of the 10 minute walks don't hurt either. The other morning I saw a monstrous snail crossing the path, the little wet trail he was leaving was a dotted line that marked his path like a cartoon. I need to start carrying my camera with me.

Here's a screenshot. I had the privilege of joining a fifteen person raid group for a run through Upper Blackrock Spire the other night. We killed The Beast on the way up. He was one angry pooch.

Friday, September 30, 2005

Lets try this again

If you've ever been too drunk to post on your blog..... you might be an idiot.
I attempted this last night, but using a painfully slow connection to upload picture files that kept disappearing when I tried to publish just made for a lot of swearing and falling-out-of-chair on my part.
I got nothin on this Jackass though: MOVIE LINK

I've got the day off from school today, something called a "reading day". Reminds me of the ol Pro-D days from elementary school. Sweet thing is that the only reading the prof had for us was to study for a drafting/layout test that's way out on next Thursday. I can do layout in my sleep. Eh? Get it? Layout, sleep?
Bah, you don't know funny.

Gonna go catch up on the latest goings-on in the world of Azeroth now. I got my mage up to the level cap a couple weeks ago, and If I spend a little time with the paladin he'll be there soon enough too. I'm gonna be the first kid on my block with two level 60 characters... and as Ken pointed out a little while back, the dedication over several months that's required to get just one up to 60 is usually enough to make the girlfriend pack her bags. My baby must really love me.

Here's a screenshot for the week. I like my new hat.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Friday again

It's been really hard to find time for posting on the blog lately... not only am I stuck with a mediocre "Shaw Light" internet connection, but I no longer get paid to sit in front of a computer for 8 hours a day. I have to do this on my own time at home now.

Drinkin beer, beer is good, long live beer. Celine Dion is a fuckin moron.

On a lighter note....

Friends shouldn't let idiots drive nice trucks: MOVIE

Friday, September 09, 2005

Friday

Friday's here, drinkin beer. Hungry now, wanna eat cow.
There's something about firing back a couple/few barley pops on a Friday afternoon that makes me feel warm and fuzzy. I'm happy as hell. School's good, Victoria's good. If I still smoked I'd be lighting up right now.

Despite my feeelings of generalized happy, there are a few things about the Okanagan that I'm gonna miss. Like my brother, Spencer, and the people at work that were cool. I will NOT miss the Okanagan summer, waaay too bloody hot.

Anyways, Craig just showed up with lots of beer...... gotta go.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Victoria

I’m here now.
All told, the move was fairly painless. The only thing that went wrong was U-Haul not having the 17’ truck that I reserved, so they upgraded me to the 26’ “Super Mover” at no additional cost. The too-big truck made loading the furniture way too easy. Downsides were the gas required for the 502 big-block gasoline Chev, (note to U-Haul: get diesel engines), and having to pay commercial truck rate on the ferry. A little well placed dissatisfaction at the truck return office, and I no longer had to make up the extra cost of only replacing $150 of the $200 worth of fuel used during the drive. I’m happy with that.
The new place is pretty sweet; two bedrooms, green yard, wood fireplace, our own driveway, and a quiet street. We had a houseful of guests here for the long weekend, Spencer drove my car down for me and picked up Chloe along the way, Jeff and Ingrid came over from Vancouver, and Craig was over regularly. The lot of us enjoyed several days of pub fare, beer, and catching up. Now the dust has settled, Christine’s at work and I’m back from my first day of class.
More later.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Truck loading day

Been up since 0611, nervous as hell.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

The last work day

Been up since 0530, nervous as hell.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Alright then, just two more days ya big woosie

Originally my employment notice had been given for this Friday, the 26th of August. I had figured on having a solid week for moving and settling down in Victoria before school started. Then it was discovered that the people who currently occupy our future home won’t be moving until the very last day possible. The day after that will be taken up by our landlord installing new carpet. This isn’t a bad thing, but it does cut that much deeper into the allocated transition period. All this adds up to a long stretch between my last day of work and moving day. People were telling me that I should spend it camping/hiking, but I’m too stressed out to have planned anything so fancy. I would have just wound up sitting on my ass in front of the computer for 5 days.

Enter my boss: Today he walked into my office and said “I can’t let you leave yet”. This was nothing new, people had been teasing me for the last few weeks about having my ankle chained to the desk… especially as D-day approached and we still hadn’t found a suitable replacement. Turns out he was serious though, the 9 weeks notice I gave just wasn’t enough, and he was promising to make it worth my while if I’d stay on until the 31st. I bargained him down to the 30th, and now I have something to keep me busy next week! Now I'll only spend the afternoons of Monday and Tuesday on my ass in front of the computer... hooray!

The new Buyer/Planner has officially been selected and I begin training him tomorrow. Half of the upstairs sales staff had applied to the internal posting for my position, but we wanted somebody with purchasing experience, even if it wasn’t in the industry. (Nobody from upstairs sales has a frigin clue about how we build things here anyways.) Now I’ve got just 5 days to get this dude all learned-up, comfortable, and familiar with the key materials planning that’s needed to keep things running. If I miss anything he’ll just have to go to my boss or the production planners for help.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Screenshot of the week

It's been quite a few weeks since I had one of these, but I don't much feel like typing words 'n such.

My brother and I with our new characters..... we're cows, and we dance.


Wednesday, August 17, 2005

I’m an omnivore and I’m okay

The other day I had some great sushi for lunch, but I didn’t get the standard woosie-assed little seaweed rolls, I got the real deal… the salmon Nigiri. For those of us who’s Japanese is a little rusty, that roughly translates to “big chunks of raw salmon”. It was awesome. Not very often do you come across a food that actually tastes like its really good for you, cooked food seems stripped and bleached by comparison.
While I was eating it I felt like a hungry grizzly bear, sitting in a stream and tearing into spawn-running salmon with my teeth and claws. Perhaps the bears are on to something with that diet… if I could only find a reliable source for fresh berries and grubs.

I’ve been having this odd reoccurring dream lately. It’s come back to haunt me at least a half dozen times over the last year… In it I’m sitting in a truck, either my old pickup or the work 5-ton, and the brakes don’t work. Not in the way you’re thinking, I’m not doing 100 kph down a hill with a sharp corner, I’m just trying to stay stopped. No matter how hard I push on the brakes, with both feet even, the truck refuses to stay put. It slowly rolls backwards or forwards on level ground, in a parking lot or at a stoplight. The only way to keep it close to where it should be is to constantly shift from forward to reverse every few seconds, using the engine idle speed to bump it back into position. At one point, with the 5-ton, I even got out to place wheel chocks under the back tires. Nothin, rolled right over them. I’m sure there are all kinds of meanings that can be derived from this. The best one that I can come up with on my own is that I don’t like change (duh). No matter how hard I try to keep things static, the big ol’ truck of my life just keeps on rollin. It’s sad, I know.
One of these nights I’m just gonna take my feet off the brake and stomp on the gas, I bet I could do a lot of damage.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Another weekend well spent

Warcraft, beer, Warcraft, beer, food, Warcraft, weed, Warcraft, beer.

Teamed up with my brother, Spencer and Craig for some great games on Saturday. Then on Sunday we all just took the time to work on our other characters…I leveled my mage from 54 to 56 in one day, even my fellow geeky guildmates were impressed.

There’s been a story going around the WoW community that some dude in Korea actually played till he died. Turns out it’s true, but it wasn’t World of Warcraft that killed him, it was Starcraft. Another great (and addictive) online game, by the same developers. Anyways, this guy sat in an internet cafĂ© and played for 50 hours straight, only stopping to go to the washroom and catch quick naps. Eventually his heart just crapped out on him. Check it out:

Death by Starcraft